The Imperfect Pot

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This endearing story that I saved many years ago popped up in one of my folders this week. Perhaps someone will discover something very important today. 

A water bearer in India had two large pots; each hung on an end of a pole that he carried across his neck. One of the pots had a crack in it. The perfect pot always delivered a full portion of water at the end of the long walk from the stream to the master's house. The cracked pot always arrived only half full.

Each day for two years, the water bearer delivered only one and a half pots full of water to his master's house. Of course, the perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments, fulfilling to perfection the role for which it was made. But the poor cracked pot was ashamed of its imperfection and felt miserable that it was able to accomplish only half of what it had been created to do.

After two years of what it perceived to be a bitter failure, the cracked pot spoke to the water bearer one day by the stream. "I am ashamed of myself, and I want to apologize to you." "What are you ashamed of?" "I have been able, for these past two years, to deliver only half my load because this crack in my side causes water to leak out all the way back to your master's house. Because of my flaws, you have to do all of this work, and you don't get full value from your efforts," the pot said sadly.

The water bearer felt sorry for the old cracked pot. With compassion he said, "As we return to the master's house today, I want you to notice the beautiful flowers along the path."

Indeed, as they went up the hill, the old cracked pot took notice of the sun warming the beautiful wild flowers on the side of the path. This cheered the pot some, but at the end of the trail, it still felt bad because it had leaked out half its load. So again the pot apologized to the bearer for its failure.

The bear said to the pot, "Did you notice that there were flowers only on your side of your path, but not on the other pot's side? That's because I have always known about your flaw, and I took advantage of it. I planted flower seeds on your side of the path, and every day while we walk back from the stream, you've watered them. For two years I have been able to pick these beautiful flowers to decorate my master's table. Without your being just the way you are, he would not have this beauty to grace his house."

Actually, all of us are "cracked pots" with unique flaws. Our response to that fact is crucial to what we will become. If we realize our potential, in spite of our imperfections, we naturally reach forward. If we focus on our imperfections, we tend to compare ourselves with others, leading to the false belief that we have nothing to offer. This mindset deceives us into feeling unimportant or insignificant. 

By simply acknowledging our imperfections and moving forward, we will discover that we, like the imperfect pot, can be the cause of beauty. Just as the water bearer saw the unique contribution the imperfect pot could make in pleasing the king, so God sees our full potential and will help us bring pleasure to Him and become a source of beauty to others here on earth. 

[Source unknown]

Magnifying Glass

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A few months ago, a newsletter from a friend caught my attention because of the way she dialogued with God about this verse:

And Mary said, “My soul magnifies the Lord,
and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior.”
Luke 1:46, 47 (ESV)

She asked God, “When Mary says her ‘soul’ magnifies the Lord,’ what does that mean, Lord? How do I do that…how can my soul magnify You? Please show me what that means.”

God led her to this definition of “magnify” by Chicago journalist, Patrick T. Reardon:

“Many modern translations begin, ‘My soul proclaims…’ or ‘My soul praises…,’ but I like the earlier word ‘magnifies’ because it’s kind of odd and mysterious. What Mary is saying is that she is like a magnifying glass. By looking at her—by looking through her—other people see God better.”(emphasis mine)

My friend continued with her insights. “It’s not uncommon for someone to say to us, ‘God worked through you.’ We have a high privilege to help others recognize God by our words and actions. By our smiles and willingness to listen.

“Howevera new picture has come into focus for me.

“Our task isn’t to do as many wonderful things as we can to represent God and show them God in us. My ordained role is not to reflect God in me. God has chosen me to simply stand in His presence, hold a magnifying glass in front of me, and let others look through the glass and see how awesome and amazing God is. God decides what things in my life He wants others to see. We don’t need to promote ourselves. Our role is to promote Him.”

In the past, I was happily aware that I have the privilege of reflecting Jesus to other people. My desire was that when they see ME, they would also see Jesus’ light in me. However, when we hold up a simple hand-held mirror, all we see is our own reflection.

Instead, He wants us to commune with Him in our soul and spirit, magnifying and exalting Him. Singing praises to Him and declaring His glory that always has been and always will be.

As we stand in His presence, we can hold our magnifying glass in front of us. When others look through that glass, they will see a clear view of all that God has brought into being.

O magnify the LORD with me, and let us exalt His name together.
Psalm 34:3 (NASB)

Will you hold up your magnifying glass so others can look through it and see the wonders God has displayed for them? Perhaps start by holding up a real magnifying glass in front of you and praying: “God, thank You that You are in my life and I can come freely into Your presence. Please guide me into opportunities to magnify You while I stand behind You. I praise You that I can have a part in helping others see You and Your works more clearly and glorify You.”

Freedom to Soar

 

Freedom. What would life be like if people of all nations in this vast world desired to live in peace and freedom?

As believers, we long for that to happen. Yet, we know the obstacle that stands in the way: the enemy. He rules the earth now. But at the appointed time, God will abolish the enemy forever and create a new heaven and new earth where His children will be free to dwell in peace and joy.

We cannot solve the problems of this present world. But God has given each of us His power to overcome whatever might be holding us captive in our inner spirits and preventing us from living as a free person in Christ.

I was emotionally captive for many years until I asked God to help me overcome my fears and become the person He created me to be. Gradually, rather than trying to be the person I thought others wanted me to be, I began living as my authentic self.

Recently, I read the powerful story below, which deepened my determination to be authentic and keep soaring in freedom! Perhaps it will help you on your own journey of freedom.

“A farmer once found a baby eagle and raised it with his chickens. The eagle learned to live as the chickens did, never attempting to fly. When a bird-watcher saw the eagle, he bought it from the farmer and attempted to teach it to fly. But the eagle would only run around and flap its wings like a chicken. Finally, the man took the bird to a high mountain. ‘You are an eagle,’ he said. ‘You should fly.’ And he threw the bird off the side of the mountain. At first the eagle cried out in fear, but then it spread its wings and soared into the sky.

“Perhaps that eagle sometimes flew over the old farmyard and missed the chickens. But it never returned to live like them, because now it knew what it meant to be an eagle.

“In a similar way, many believers do not fully understand who they are in Christ. As a result, they miss the incredible blessings God has intended for His people. In a spiritual sense, they never learn to soar free above all creation.

“What would it be like to see ourselves as our loving Father sees us? God says, ‘Anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun!’ (2 Corinthians 5:17). We can see ourselves as God does by exercising our faith as we read the Bible, believing what it says about God and what it says about us.

“Isn’t it time to stop listening to what others say about [us] and start listening to God?” 

* Story taken from the Discover God Study Bible NLT, page 2094. Copyright © 2000. Used by permission of Bright Media Foundation, represented by Tyndale House Publishers. All rights reserved.

Did you glean some new insights from this narrative?  I would love to read your comment in the box below. 

Sometimes, it’s easy to believe the lies of the enemy, who whispers negative things about us. His accusations keep us walking on the ground.

But God’s words, which are full of love, are designed to lift us up and give us freedom to soar.

The Lord your God is in your midst,
A victorious warrior.
He will rejoice over you with joy,
He will be quiet in His love,
He will rejoice over you with shouts of joy.

Zephaniah 3:17 (NASB)

The Plans of God

Use! Thomas Molly Gail 25th anniv

My unexpected invitation brought me joy and increased my dependence on the Holy Spirit.

The invitation came from Judy Douglass, the wife of the former president of Cru/Campus Crusade for Christ. For many years, she wanted to create a book called, “Pioneer Women of Cru.” The time had come.

She and her team chose fifty staff women who made an indelible mark on the ministry. Now they needed others to interview the women and write their personal stories. I felt honored to have a part in this wonderful project.

After scanning the list of women, I knew I wanted to write the story of Molly Abraham, who now lives in heaven. It was an easy choice, because I loved Molly and had known her for more than thirty years.

Both Thomas and Molly lived in South India. However, in 1967, while they were temporarily living in Portland, Oregon, a friend of theirs introduced them to Dr. Bill Bright, the president of Campus Crusade for Christ. Dr. Bright challenged them to become staff members, and it didn’t take them long to say yes. Obviously, Dr. Bright sensed that Thomas was a man of faith and vision, because he appointed him India National Director and directed him to return home and begin the India Campus Crusade ministry.

Before beginning their work with students, Thomas and Molly prayed and asked God for 5,000 decisions for Christ during their first year on campus. By the end of the year, 5,067 students had indicated decisions for Christ! That miracle was only the beginning of all that God accomplished through them in their lifetime.

Amazingly, God planned that Thomas, Molly and I would join Campus Crusade in 1967 and go through staff training together at the Arrowhead Springs headquarters. We enjoyed our special friendship, but never dreamed we would see each other again. After all, they were returning to India.

Then, in 1974, God called me to Campus Crusade’s area office in Asia. Originally located in Manila, Philippines, the office soon moved north to Baguio City. Every year the Asia national directors met together in one of the countries. As part of the admin staff, I traveled to each location. You can imagine the thrill of seeing Thomas and Molly at my first national directors' meeting!

Though we enjoyed our yearly visits, the bigger delight came when Thomas was appointed the Central Asia-Pacific director and he moved to Baguio City with Molly and their three children! From then on, our office team became part of Thomas and Molly’s family.

Since Molly was already with Jesus when I began writing her story, I asked the Holy Spirit to show me where to find the information I needed. He prompted me to look in my keepsake box, where I had fortunately saved the four-page newsletter Thomas wrote in celebration of his twenty-fifth wedding anniversary. His letter not only traced Thomas and Molly’s life from 1962-1987, but included details about people, places, dates, and major events. That "golden newsletter" became a framework for all the other input I received.

As I continue to write Molly’s story, I am depending on the Holy Spirit to give me words that will bring glory to God.

Molly and Thomas filled my heart with love and showed me how to live a faithful life. I’ll be forever grateful for the plan of God that brought us together.

The Whispers of God

A young boy playing a piano.

"Wishing to encourage her young son’s progress on the piano, a mother took her boy to a Paderewski concert. After they were seated, the mother spotted an old friend in the audience and walked down the aisle to greet her. Seizing the opportunity to explore the wonders of the concert hall, the little boy rose and eventually made his way through a door marked, ‘No Admittance.'

"When the house lights dimmed and the concert was about to begin, the mother returned to her seat and discovered that her child was missing. Suddenly, the curtains parted and spotlights focused on the impressive Steinway on stage. In horror, the mother saw her little boy sitting at the piano, innocently picking out 'Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star.'

"At that moment, the great piano master made his entrance, quickly moved to the piano, and whispered in the boy’s ear, 'Don’t quit. Keep playing.' Then leaning over, Paderewski reached down with his left hand and began filling in a bass part. Soon his right arm reached around to the other side of the child, and he added a running obbligato. Together, the old master and the young novice transformed what could have been a frightening situation into a wonderfully creative experience. The audience was so mesmerized that they couldn’t recall what else the great master played. Only the classic, 'Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star.'

"Perhaps that’s the way it is with God. What we can accomplish on our own is hardly noteworthy. We try our best, but the results aren’t always graceful, flowing music. However, with the hand of the Master, our life’s work can truly be beautiful. Next time you set out to accomplish great feats, listen carefully. You may hear the voice of the Master, whispering in your ear, 'Don’t quit. Keep playing.' May you feel His arms around you and know that His hands are there helping you turn your feeble attempts into true masterpieces."

For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.(Ephesians 2:10 (NLT)

What might your life be like if you willingly give your own efforts to God and allow Him to transform them into His masterpiece?

 

The source of this story about Paderewski is unknown. Ignacy Jan Paderewski, who died at 81, was a Polish virtuoso pianist, composer, a statesman who spoke for Polish independence, and president of Poland soon after World War I.

Photo by Nightowl at pixabay.com/users/nightowl-29/

Make Time to Love

An older couple posing for a photo in a park.

What is the hardest thing for you to give up on a daily basis?

For me, it’s my time. Since I’m a planner, it’s a continual challenge to release time to spend with people and get involved with activities outside my regular agenda. In the past, I gave more priority to my projects than to people.

However, in recent years God showed me the importance of intentionally letting go of some of my neatly-arranged plans and creating space to enjoy friends and family. Now that people’s names are sprinkled throughout my monthly calendar, my joy has increased and my stress decreased.

This life-changing lesson also brought about a desire to build a deeper and more meaningful relationship with my Uncle Miles. When Aunt Elia went to heaven, his life changed drastically. Mine did, too. Her death was one of many losses among my family members within a short period of time.

In my sorrow, I cried out to God, “Father, please don’t take Uncle Miles from me yet. I can’t say goodbye to anyone else right now. Please let me have more time with him.”

God gave me six more years. Those years became the most memorable ones for me. Uncle Miles and I became close friends, not just family. Our friendship filled the empty places in both of our lives. We began taking turns calling each other every weak—either he from the west coast or me from the east side of the country. We discussed family memories and happenings, but he always wanted to know about me. In turn, I wanted to hear about the highlights and downsides of his life at the retirement center.

It didn’t matter that he was in his 90’s. He stayed engaged in my life. Every fall I flew to Oregon for several weeks to see family and friends. During those times, he and I talked together in his apartment, shared some meals in the dining hall, and ate at a couple special restaurants. Our spontaneous phone calls in between were a treat.

We also began a tradition of taking a day trip together every year. Our favorite outings included drinking in the beauty of the Colombia River gorge and enjoying the majesty of Mt. Hood. Though hindered by his macular degeneration, he amazingly directed our journeys and made sure I didn’t miss any turns.

One year, after delivering Uncle Miles back to the center following our day trip, we sat together in his apartment. Words of encouragement and mutual admiration flowed between us.

Finally, we stood and hugged good-bye. “Honey, thanks for spending time with me. Really enjoyed our visits while you’ve been here and especially our trip today.”

Knowing I was returning to Orlando the next day, we looked into each other’s eyes with deep love. I believe he knew he wouldn’t see me again. I was unaware. Perhaps that’s why God prompted me to say, “Uncle Miles, I’ll see you next time . . . but if not, I’ll see you in heaven.”

Uncle Miles died less than three months later at the age of 97. I’ll be forever grateful to God for showing me how to make time to love my precious uncle so I wouldn’t miss the memories I’ll cherish forever.

What memories do you share with a special person because you chose to give up your own plans and spend time with them?

From Fear to Freedom

If fear of rejection is controlling your life take the rejection quiz and find out.

May this be the year we live in Freedom to be Authentic!

For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago. (Ephesians 2:10, NLT)

Imagine! We are God’s masterpiece! He wants us to let go of any fear lingering inside of us. And relinquish our “people pleasing” that has kept us striving to be the person others wanted us to be. Let’s ask the Holy Spirit to help us overcome our fear so we can shine as the authentic person God created us to be!

Many of you know that fear of rejection defined my life for forty years. The thought of telling others my inner thoughts or opinions or struggles frightened me. In His time, God revealed my false identity and showed me how to give up my deception and freely live as my authentic self.

What has been your personal experience with fear and freedom? Perhaps you grew up with confidence to be your real self. Praise God. And you’ve been able to help others come out of hiding. Great.

Or maybe you’re wondering, “Do I have a fear of rejection?”

I know the feeling. After God set me free, He helped me create my Fear of Rejection Quiz that answers that important question.

This quiz will give you a chance to discover and acknowledge any fear of rejection symptoms you may have. You will also learn about common barriers you may have built to prevent people from knowing who you really are inside. Once you recognize your emotional defenses, you will be able to tear them down and begin living as the authentic person God created you to be!

Take a moment now to see how you score on the Fear of Rejection Quiz! By applying what you learn, you will be able to take steps toward a life of freedom from fear. God will lead the way.  

Please feel free to share this link with others who may be struggling with fear of rejection. You could be the one who helps them take their first steps toward freedom.

With God going before us, we all have an opportunity to experience Freedom to be Authentic!

Grocery Store Experience – Part Two

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The impact of my experience in the grocery store last month didn’t fade away after I related the story in my September blog. The extraordinary events of that day, that involved a store clerk, an old man, and God’s presence, lingered in my heart. (Click here if you want to read the beginning of the story!)

Because of what the store clerk and I witnessed that day, I longed to see him again and relive the wonder. God showed up because of my prayer that morning:

Please help Your presence be obvious in my encounters and conversations with people today.

The clerk and I hadn’t exchanged names, so I called customer service. I described him the best I could, and the man on the phone concluded it was Frank. When I explained I wanted to come to the store to talk with Frank, he said, “He’s working today and will have a break at noon.”

I climbed into my Malibu for the short drive to the store, where I caught the attention of an employee coming out of the customer service area. After explaining my mission, the man pointed to Frank’s aisle.

I turned. There he was, full of energy and smiles for his customers, just as he was the day I stood in his aisle to pay for my purchases.

As the clock approached noon, the service man informed me of his plan to tell Frank that someone was waiting to see him. My excitement mounted. Our reunion was about to begin.

I hovered near Frank’s isle. He finished with his last customer, tossed the “closed” sign on the conveyor belt, and looked up with a huge smile.

“How are you?” He remembered me!

I beamed! “I wanted to come see you again after what happened last month.” He came around the counter and gave me a big hug. After the old man left the store during my first visit, Frank and I talked about our mutual desire to show God's love to others, which formed a natural bond.

We took turns describing how each part of that morning impacted us.

“Thank you for paying the balance of the old man’s bill that day. That was very kind,” Frank said.

“I knew Jesus wanted me to.”

Frank continued, “Every day I encounter that kind of situation, especially with those depending on state funds. I always try to help them.” When I inquired further, he humbly confirmed he paid out of his own pocket.

I also learned that Frank had retired, but returned because he loves being around people and serving on the customer service team. It’s a perfect fit. And obviously part of God’s mission for him.

Then I handed Frank a copy of my September blog. “I wrote this story about our shared experience and I want you to have a copy.” Tears welled up in his eyes. “Thank you so much. I’ll read it during my break and probably cry.”

We agreed that God had orchestrated everything that took place in that narrow check-out aisle, including the chance to acknowledge God to the old man.

After hugging once more, we parted ways. I headed toward the door, but suddenly had an urge to take a picture, almost as if I needed visual confirmation that God’s unique answer to my prayer truly happened.

I called to Frank. “Let’s take a picture as a remembrance.” He immediately recruited a friend to help.

God uses each of us in creative ways to show His love to others.

"But thanks be to God, who always leads us in triumph in Christ,
and through us reveals the fragrance of the knowledge of Him
in every place.
 For we are a fragrance of Christ to God
among those who are being saved and
among those who are perishing."
2 Corinthians 2:14-15 (NASB) 

Many viewers responded to my original post by relating ways God has used them to make a difference in people’s life. I selected a few stories that I hope will inspire you as you seek ways to become the “fragrance of Christ” to those around you.

Pat Hunt

Gail, I read your story about your encounter with the “older” man in the grocery store. You asked your audience if we had unforeseen encounters when God used us to minister to those God put in our path.

Yesterday, in the common area at the Westmoreland Union Manor, I ran into my friend, Bonnie, whom I hadn’t seen for a long time. Her health had declined, so I told her I’d pray for her. She was astounded that I’d write her name in my already-long prayer list. She thanked me and we parted ways, only to be reunited later that day in a local grocery store, by God’s providential timing.

We talked more about God and His Promises in His Word. The word “hope” dropped into my mind, and I told Bonnie to hang onto hope, for without hope we tend to give up. I added, “I’ll find a promise in the Word and claim that for you.”

She got teary-eyed and asked me to let her know the promise. A few hours later, while looking for a card to give to her, I found a small packet of Hallmark cards I’d forgotten about. The front of one card said, “Those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength,” (Isaiah 40:31 NIV). Wow! That was the perfect verse and promise for her. I felt blessed to write this promise of hope in her card!

I pray each day that God will use me, and I will be ready in season and out of season!

Rebecca Carpenter

I loved your story. I also ask each day how I can help someone. My husband, Alan, always used to say, “We never know who is watching.”

Lois Nobles

Yes, we express God’s love in actions in daily life. Gail is always ready to do this.

I was with a friend and suddenly she chocked up and could not breath or speak normally. Her face became pale and expressionless. I prayed out load, “Breath is God’s inspiration, He maintains our normal body functions, and He is present here and now. We are his spiritual creations. Human mortal circumstances cannot change our perfection and relationship with God.”

Soon after my prayer, she regained her normal breathing and speech. We thanked God for saving her life.

Beth Augee

I love your musings. Besides hearing about how God is using you and your literary giftings, it also shows your continuing sharing of Jesus as a way of life.

That is what Rod and I love to do. In fact, last Monday, while sharing "7 Ways Doing a Puzzle Benefits You" to a group of recovering heart patients, I caught the eyes of a first-timer to our monthly meetings. She had just shared her heart story, including the words, "Well, at least it is better than the alternative (meaning death)."

God spoke through me, as I smiled and said, "Because I am a Christian, the alternative sounds pretty good to me."

She smiled back, and several others, whom I knew are followers of Jesus, also smiled with looks of joy and confirmation. The other attendees heard about the hope that only Jesus can give them.

Fourteen years ago, I had a heart attack and have had several other moderate heart issues since then. Because I wanted to “give back” to the local hospital for their excellent care, I became a volunteer and began visiting heart patients and families in the Cardiac Care unit.

When a national heart support group, Mended Hearts, was in the process of opening a chapter at our hospital, I became involved. I served as president of three chapters over twelve years. Though not a Christian organization, Mended Hearts opened many doors for love and encouragement to people in hours of fear and unknown futures. Volunteering with Mended Hearts gave me many opportunities to share the love and saving grace of God.

Click here if you want to read the beginning of this story in my previous blog.

To comment on this blog, use the box below.

God’s Presence in the Every Day

One morning I wrote my prayers to God in my journal, beginning with these words:

Please help Your presence be obvious in my encounters and conversations with people today.

The next morning, when I opened my journal and glanced at the prayer request I'd written the day before, I laughed out loud! You see, God had caused yesterday’s events to unfold exactly the way I prayed.

Come with me to the nearby grocery store. After perusing the aisles and checking items off my list, I rolled my cart to an available row and stood in line. I bantered with the young man in back of me.

Then I became aware of some kind of confusion at the end of the aisle where an old man was struggling to swipe his SNAP card because his hands were shaking. He handed the card to the clerk, who rang it up at the register. Then came the unexpected announcement, “Sir, you still owe $9.45.”

The bewildered man stared at the clerk and then pointed to the fully-loaded cart, as if to say, “But everything is ready to go.”

I knew the customer couldn’t pay, so I instinctively reached in my purse for my billfold.

The clerk explained to him, “Your card paid the $54 for groceries, but it won’t pay for the wine.”

I piped up, “I’ll pay the balance.”  Inside, I smiled at the irony of paying for the man’s wine rather than healthy food.

The young clerk looked at me hesitatingly, then accepted the $10 bill from my outstretched hand and returned the change. “Thank you, young lady.”

The stooped man swiveled his body to get a glimpse of his rescuer. I smiled at him and declared, “That was from God.”

He scoffed out loud at the mention of God’s name. Now released from his debt, though, he placed both hands on his cart and ambled toward the door.

I stepped up to the counter. “Thank you, again, young lady, for what you did.” (I was really liking the “young lady” part by then.”)

I shrugged my shoulders. “That’s why we’re alive.”

His eyes twinkled and a smile spread across his handsome face. “That is so true. I encounter this kind of thing every day and I try to help.”

“I can tell you know Jesus!” I said.

His smile broadened.

Right there in the aisle of that ordinary, neighborhood store, God’s presence surrounded the four of us. The young man behind me observed all that transpired, and surely God planted a seed in his heart. The unbelieving man’s monetary dilemma shifted to a full resolution, and in the process he heard the name of God. The store clerk received unexpected encouragement that day and also a chance to affirm his faith. My heart exploded with joy, because God had touched each one of us in a special way.

God asks us to be ready “in season and out of season,” because we never know when He might want to use us to carry out His plan.

Do you remember a time you prayed and God answered in an amazing way?

Unexpected Breakthrough

A bird is sitting on a tree trunk.

Sometimes breakthrough is a process. The woodpecker doesn’t stop to worry about what the other birds think about them, it just does what it is designed to do. ~ Sammy Robinson

When I read this quote in the blog of my friend, Elizabeth Horbelt,* the words reminded me of one of my breakthroughs during a writing conference in 2004. Because I cared so much what people thought of me, I had unconsciously built an invisible wall to protect myself from possible rejection. God was about to disclose the results of my decision.

On the first evening, the conference keynote speaker said, “Breakthrough to the next level comes only through brokenness.” He grabbed my attention immediately.

“Not your efforts, but brokenness, helps you get through to a new level,” the speaker continued. “God will hit where we have built walls that keep Him at a distance. We all build walls. Sometimes God shoots a customized arrow into our hearts to wake us up.”

While absorbing this declaration, I felt intense pain in my chest. With it came a sense that God had pierced my heart and said, “Your wall is keeping you at a distance from Me.”

The thought that I had hurt the heart of God became unbearable. I had no idea I’d built an emotional wall of protection around my heart.

As soon as the speaker finished, I hurried from the session to seek aloneness in my quiet hotel room. As I knelt and buried my head in my hands, tears seeped through my fingers.

“God, I didn’t know anything stood between You and me.”

He revealed I had constructed a wall out of my fear of what people would think about me. That wall had become my emotional protection. My wall also blocked me from absorbing the truth that God loves me, accepts me, protects me, and delights in me. I confessed my actions as sin against God. My sorrow lifted when I opened myself to receive His promised forgiveness.

During those moments of brokenness, the source of my fear became clear. I reached for my notebook to record my thoughts.

Soon I’d sketched the outline of a wall. In the empty boxes that formed the foundation, I added words that came to my mind: “childhood patterns,” “defense mechanisms,” and “family expectations.”

On each brick, I wrote an internal struggle that held me captive and governed my involuntary responses to people: fear of failure, fear of disappointing others, fear of not measuring up, need for approval, need for acceptance.

Author Paul Richardson explains more about our walls in his book A Certain Risk,

In response to our most unforgettable heartaches, many of us have closed ourselves off, locked our hearts behind unassailable walls, and
hidden away the key. . . .

He is showing me that the greatest barriers to his artistry in and through my life are not physical dangers. The real barriers are my own conjured fears. These fears are phony castle walls I’ve constructed around me.

During my conversation with God in my hotel room that day, I received courage to emotionally let the bricks of my castle walls crumble. Nothing stood between God and me anymore.

My unexpected breakthrough to the next level came through brokenness, just as the speaker explained. Once my wall was gone, I began relating to people in an open and authentic way without holding back from sharing about my personal life.

I'm looking forward to my continuing journey on God's path of freedom where I'm becoming more and more the person God designed me to be. **

Have you built an emotional wall of protection around yourself? What factors might have led you to construct your foundation and lay bricks on top? God is waiting to show you how to experience a life of freedom outside your wall.

* Link to Elizabeth Horbelt’s May 17 blog: "Designed for Breakthrough."

** Some of the content in this blog is adapted from pages 31-34 of my book, *Will the Real Person Please Stand Up: Rising Upon the Fear of Rejection,* and is used by permission.
Link to order your own copy.