Gail Porter

Gail Porter is an inspirational speaker, award-winning author, and workshop leader. She has a passion to help people let go of their fear of rejection so they can be free to live an authentic life. Her three companion books are helping others walk in freedom: <i>Will the Real Person Please Stand Up? Rising Above the Fear of Rejection<i>; <i>Free to be the Real You: A Women's Weekend Retreat<i>; </i>and <i>Living on the Path of Freedom: Leaving Fear of Rejection Behind.</i>

TREASURING OUR MEMORIES

Slice of Time

What is one of your favorite memories? Why is it precious to you?

One of the fondest memories that comes to my mind is spending a sunny afternoon with my 90-year-old uncle and taking this picture together. That day remains special because we talked a lot about our heartaches.  

Cascading illnesses and death in my extended family had threatened to overcome me. Within three years, I had said goodbye to six beloved members of my dwindling family. The tears kept coming, especially for my brother who died in his sixties from leukemia. However, God’s light always shown through when I remembered that all of them were enjoying the beauty of heaven and the presence of their God.

On one emotional day I pleaded with God. 

“Please don’t let Uncle Miles die yet!
I can’t bear to say goodbye to one more person. Please give us more time together.”

Let me tell you what happened!

God heard my prayer and gave me six more years with Uncle Miles! Years that gave us a chance to build a deeper and sweeter bond, and a more honest, caring, and loving relationship.

When he entered heaven at 96 years of age, joy came first before sadness, because God had given me more time to love and be loved by my unforgettable uncle.

What is your special memory? I hope you will share yours with us by leaving your comment in the box below. Let’s continue building memories to cherish.

The Open Door

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Sometimes God opens a door when we least expect it!

One day I called GoDaddy to ask some questions. A young woman answered and gave me her name.

“That’s the name of my best friend from elementary school,” I exclaimed, “and we’re still in touch. How do you spell your name?”

My question became God's open door.  

Later, Malia mentioned an experience at work that ended positively. I couldn’t resist adding, “I have God in my life, and that sounds like something He would do. Perhaps you’re a Christian?”

“Yes. God is with me every day.”

Malia said to me, “Gail, I see that your current website highlights your books. After talking with you, I think you should consider creating a small website. This would let people know who you are, your vision and how you can provide assistance to others through your own wisdom and teachings.” 

I sat in my chair, astonished by her comments. Only God could have given Malia those insights about my future and my desire to connect with women personally. With confidence, I said yes to a new website.

The next day Malia sent me a recap of our conversation. She ended with, “I’m super excited to see your vision become reality.” My viewpoint: God’s vision expressed through Malia!

Keep on asking,
and you will receive
what you ask for.
Keep on seeking,
and you will find.
Keep on knocking
and the door
will be opened to you.

Matthew 7:8 (NLT)

I had been knocking and asking God to show me the way. Then He opened the door and Malia walked into my life!

Have you seen God open a door for you? What was the outcome?

Share your experience in the comment box below! 

 

* Open door Image by Manfred Antranias Zimmer from Pixabay

SET FREE

SET FREE

This is the day You lovingly gave
Your life away for me
You asked the cup to pass from You
But death it had to be.

For I was bound in sin and death
Never to be free
Unless Your sacrificial blood
Was shed upon a tree.

You hung in pain and agony
Obeying Your Father’s will
Showing compassion for the thief
His longing heart to fill.

You finally cried, “It is finished”
My freedom and salvation bought
My inheritance ready and waiting
If only You I sought.

One day I completely realized
How much You’d given for me
And opened my heart to receive you
Forever Your child to be.

What wondrous love, my Savior,
that You would die for me
Amazing grace so undeserved
Through You I’ve been set free!

 

GAIL PORTER
Words by Gail Porter © 1994 by Gail Porter

 

LANGUAGE OF LOVE

When Valentine’s Day approaches, people in America as well as in other countries, naturally think about love.

Unexpectedly, my mind gravitated to the wildly popular book, “The Five Love Languages,” by Gary Chapman, Ph.D., author, speaker, and counselor.

In his book, he explains five ways people express and receive love.

  1. Words of affirmation
  2. Quality time
  3. Physical touch
  4. Acts of service
  5. Receiving gifts

As you look at this list, take a moment to identify the way you like to show love to others. Also, determine which kind of action from others makes you feel loved.

As a counselor, Gary knows that many marriages have been saved when both the husband and wife knew how their partners desired to receive love. And marriages also became strong when both partners understood the way their mates preferred to express love to other people and were willing to allow time and space for that to happen.

This kind of knowledge and understanding can also improve interactions between parents and their children, with dating couples, among roommates, between fragile teenagers, or in any setting where dialogs take place.

I remember my younger days when I roomed with two friends. We enjoyed one another but sometimes lacked good communication because our viewpoints were so different. However, we were able to understand and accept each other better after learning about the five love languages and realizing we each showed love to others in different ways.

One friend communicated her love through doing “acts of service” and being available whenever a need arose. My other friend showed her love by using her gift of mercy and imparting “words of affirmation” to everyone she met. Since my love language was “quality time,” I relished the chance to spend unhurried time with one person at a time. That way I could listen to them, encourage them, and let them know they matter to me. Happily, those roommates and I are still in touch after all these years.

The discovery of the five love languages also shifted my understanding of my caring mother, who loved me faithfully all her life. I never recognized that Mom expressed her love for me though “acts of service.” And what she longed to receive from me was “words of affirmation.” I wish I could have had more time to love her that way before God took her to heaven.

It’s wonderful to be loved by others, but the best way to fill our life with love, is to receive the love of God.

God embodies all the languages of love! Love from our Father is available to us every moment.

He can help you express genuine love to others and receive the kind of love He knows you need most.

I have loved you, my people,
with an everlasting love.
With unfailing love
I have drawn you to myself.
Jeremiah 31:3 (NLT)

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Now I See

“As Jesus was walking along, He saw a man who had been blind since birth” (John 9:1).

Perfectly orchestrated by God, Jesus slowed His steps until he stood in front of the blind man, who had lived without hope his entire life.

His disciples couldn’t resist asking Him whether the man’s blindness was the result of the man’s sin or his parents’ sins.

Jesus answered them, “It was not because of his sins or his parents’ sins. This [man’s blindness] happened so the power of God could be seen in him” (John 10:3).

Silently, Jesus spit on the ground and used his saliva to create mud. Lifting His arms, He carefully spread the mud on the blind man’s eyes. Next came His gentle words, “Go wash yourself in the Pool of Siloam” (John 10:7).

Let’s pause and put ourselves in his place…you have mud spread over your eyes. You wonder, what are people thinking about me? What if nothing happens? I’ll be an even bigger fool if I’m still blind.”

Yet, with fragile faith, the man clung to the arm of his helper as they ambled toward the Pool of Siloam. Once there, perhaps a kind soul reached in his robe, withdrew a cloth, and placed it in the assistant’s hand. After leading him down the steps to the water and saturating the cloth, the man’s companion softly wiped the brown mud from one closed eye and then the other.

The silent crowd waited. With hope filling his heart, the man gradually opened both eyes. A brilliant smile spread across his weathered face as he began his assent.

Can’t you imagine the commotion in the crowd when they saw him climb out of the pool by himself?

Though accustomed to staying in the shadows, he couldn’t resist raising his arms and shouting, “I can see! I can see!”

This joyful scene always reminds me of the chorus a group of my college friends and I enjoyed singing, along with gestures, “Walking, and leaping, and praising God; walking, and leaping, and praising God. In the name of Jesus Christ of Nazarene, rise up and walk.” Though these words referred to the lame man’s miracle, we always envisioned the blind man jumping and leaping and praising God for the miracle of his sight!

Amazing symbolism is embodied in that unforgettable day. Jesus didn’t instruct the blind man to wash in the Pool of Siloam simply because it was the only source of fresh water within the walls of ancient Jerusalem.

God directed Him to choose the Pool of Siloam because Siloam means “sent.” Two people envisioned the significance this way:

The blind man was sent to a pool called “Sent”
by the One who was Himself sent by God into the world.

The One sent by God to be our Savior used the Pool
of “Sent”
to prove that He is the Light of the World.

After the healed man returned, he had no time to celebrate his miracle. His neighbors and others who knew him didn’t believe his story and debated among themselves. The Pharisees and Jewish leaders constantly bombarded him with intense questions and angry accusations.

Worn out, his only recourse was to tell the truth: “I don’t know whether he is a sinner. But I know this: I was blind and now I can see?” (John 9:25).

As time passed by, this underprivileged man began to reply to questions with wisdom only God could have supplied. One day he announced to the leaders, “Ever since the world began, no one has been able to open the eyes of someone born blind. If this man were not from God, he couldn’t have done it.” (John 9:32-33).

Enraged, his accusers shouted at him, “Are you trying to teach us?” (John 9:34). Then they threw him out of the synagogue.

Later, when Jesus heard what happened, he found the man and asked, “Do you believe in the Son of Man?” (John 9:35).

The man answered, “Who is he, sir? I want to believe in him,” (John 9:36).

“You have seen him,” Jesus said, “and he is speaking to you!” (John 9:37).

“Yes, Lord, I believe!” the man said and He worshiped Jesus. (John 9:38).

Jesus had already performed His miraculous physical healing. The man’s eyes were probably still bright with wonder. However, during this conversation, a greater healing had taken place. The moment the man declared, “Yes, Lord, I believe,” the Light of the World filled his heart, soul, and mind, and changed his life forever.

As we consider how God rescued us from an ordinary existence that would have left us without hope of eternal life, may we say with the blind man, “Once I was blind but now I see.”

“O Sovereign Lord! You made the heavens
and earth by your strong hand
and powerful arm.

Nothing is too hard for You!”
Jeremiah 32:17 (NLT)

Have you been faced with something in your life you thought was impossible to overcome and God provided an unexpected solution? Thank God as you recall your amazing experience and share it with others. Why not begin now by leaving your comment in the box below?

Mary’s Heart

Painting of Mary, mother of Jesus.

The song Mary Did You Know? always moves me to tears. I can only imagine the emotions that swirled in Mary’s heart when the angel Gabriel presented the life-altering news that she would give life to the Son of God.

Have you ever wondered how Mary had the courage to respond to such a shocking message? She didn’t whisper a soft yes. She boldly declared, “Behold, the Lord’s bond-servant; may it be done to me, according to your word.”

The reasons why young Mary accepted her mission so willingly is beautifully described by Debby Thompson, who writes under the banner of Living With Eternal Intentionality®. With her permission, I’m sharing the following excerpt from her December blog, “Mary Said Yes.” I also invite you to read the rest of Debby’s story. http://www.debbythompson.com/gps/2020/11/16/mary-said-yes-to-god

Mary said Yes to God—to His will, to His plan, to His call on her life. Her destiny was contained in her response, and I am astounded each time I read it! How was this humanly possible for one so young, so innocent?

A closer look at the text sheds light on her faith-filled choice.

Mary said Yes to God because she knew the Word of God.

And

Because she knew the Word of God, she knew the Person of God.

And

Because she knew the Person of God, she was prepared to say yes to the opportunity of God.

Her song (Luke 1:46-55) is saturated with Old Testament teaching where she exclaims the character of God, the faithfulness of God, the power of God, even the priorities of God. The significance of her response is steeped in the significance of Scripture. And here the connective gem emerges:

Knowing her God and knowing His Word laid the foundation for Mary to say Yes to God with pure, simple faith.

The God that Mary knew invited her into His plan, and Mary said yes. She chose to believe (Luke 1: 45). She chose to obey.

 

Friends, in this divine season let us look for ways to deepen our love of God's Word and our knowledge of Him. Then, like Mary, we will be able to say yes to whatever invitation God presents to us in the coming year.

A Heart of Gratitude

The days have rolled around to Thanksgiving week, a blessed time of the year. We naturally contemplate all the ways we can be thankful.

Below is a profound quote that focuses on gratitude, which means a general appreciation of life. The words filled my mind with possibilities. Perhaps you will feel the same.

It tells of simple ways our lives could change if we view our situations with a heart of gratitude. We can easily concentrate on things that are happening in our lives that we wish were different. However, looking at them through eyes of gratitude can change everything. As the first line says: Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life!

Gratitude unlocks life's fullness. - Melody Beattie

If you choose gratitude, what difference
might that make in your current situation?

To share your answer, post your comment below! 

Creative Connections

Two women sitting on park benches.

While perched on a comfortable chair in the nail salon, I relished the chance to relax and devour more chapters from my favorite author’s book. Meanwhile, my sweet Vietnamese friend, Lily, created a beautiful set of newly-painted toenails for me. Afterwards, she pulled out her phone to show me the latest picture of her adorable young daughter.

I continued reading while waiting for my toenails to dry. When I turned and reached for my pink and white water container, the woman in the seat beside me smiled and asked, “What are you reading?”

After giving her a brief description, I asked what books she liked. She rattled off a few titles. We laughed about our mutual love of books and also exchanged names.

Mary proudly announced, “I belong to a book club.”

When I responded, “I’m an author,” Mary’s face lite up. “What do you write?”

“I’ve written several books about fear of rejection. They are based on my personal journey of struggling with fear and finding God’s path of freedom. Now I’m passionate about helping others let go of their fear so they can become their authentic self.”

“God has helped me a lot in my life,” Mary said, “but I sometimes still struggle with fear of what others think about me.”

Just then, Ty, one of the other nail technicians, beckoned her to his station for a manicure. Mary smiled at me, “Guess I’m on to part two!”

As she rose I told her, “I have a copy of two of my books in the car and I’d like to give them to you. I’ll connect with you before I leave.”

But a short while later, Mary reclaimed her original spa chair, prompting me to ask,

“What happened?”

“Ty asked me to wait here because he needed to pause briefly and assist another customer. He’ll let me know when he’s ready. Gail, Ty has never done that before. This is all a ‘God thing.’”

I smiled in agreement while enjoying her excitement. “Guess this gives us more time to talk!”

We finished our appointments at the same time, and Mary handed me a note that listed her contact information. As we walked to my car together, I think we both felt like old friends. After signing both books, I handed them to her, along with my contact information.

She planned to read the books and then suggest them to her book club. We promised to keep in touch, which would be easy since she lived only a few blocks from me. Once again, we acknowledged God’s hand in all that had transpired.

A few days later, Mary called about her discovery. “We have a mutual friend—Debbie Burton, whom you know from your Word Weavers critique group. She is the founder and leader of my book club. We taught together at Dover Shores Elementary.”

A few weeks passed. I was already scheduled to do a book signing with two author friends at a bookstore in a neighboring city. When I realized that my good friend Susan, who usually comes with me to these events, would be out of town, Mary’s name popped into my mind.

When I sent an email to Mary inviting her to go with me and help at the bookstore, her answer didn’t catch me off guard. It simply reminded me of myself many years ago when I held back from saying yes to opportunities if there were unknowns involved.

“I received your email last night,” Mary said, “but I wanted time to think about it a bit. Thank you for asking me. I think I’m ready to take a giant step out of my comfort zone and accompany you.”

I was proud of her for saying no to her fears and taking a step forward. Even though it was her first time being involved in this kind of event, she adapted quickly and helped me arrange my book table. I watched her delight as she met the other two authors as well as the people who wandered into the bookstore and stopped at our table. Our friendship deepened because of our  adventure.

God wasn’t finished with His creative connections at the nail salon. During my next appointment, a similar scenario unfolded. I was quietly reading my book, and when I looked up, the woman next to me asked, “What are you reading?”

We exchanged titles of favorite books as well as our names. When Dorothy discovered I wrote about fear of rejection, she said, “I would like to read your book.” I wrote down a title for her.

Like Mary, Dorothy was soon called away to Ty’s station for a manicure. Afterwards, she stopped by my chair. “Could I also have your email because I want to write you after I read your book.”

“Sure, that would be great. I’m glad we met, Dorothy.”

I hope Dorothy will call me, because I sensed sadness in her eyes. She had no pep and gave no indication of happiness. Even when she walked to Ty’s station, her slow steps gave me the impression that she had nothing to look forward to.

God created a beautiful opportunity to offer dignity to Dorothy that day by looking into her eyes, listening to her words, interacting with her, and paving the way for her to read my book that will speak to her heart. I believe God’s plan was for me to be one link in the chain of people who will eventually lead Dorothy to Jesus.

The Lord has made the heavens his throne;
from there he rules over everything.
Praise the Lord, you angels,
you mighty ones who carry out his plans,
listening for each of his commands.
Yes, praise the Lord, you armies of angels
who serve him and do his will!

Psalm 103:19-21
(New Living Translation)

Have you had an unexpected connection with someone recently? Did you sense that God created the opportunity for you? Click below to share your experience. I hope you will preserve your memory by writing in your journal or another special place.

The Imperfect Pot

Here's an alt tag for the image: Brown clay pot on gravel.

This endearing story that I saved many years ago popped up in one of my folders this week. Perhaps someone will discover something very important today. 

A water bearer in India had two large pots; each hung on an end of a pole that he carried across his neck. One of the pots had a crack in it. The perfect pot always delivered a full portion of water at the end of the long walk from the stream to the master's house. The cracked pot always arrived only half full.

Each day for two years, the water bearer delivered only one and a half pots full of water to his master's house. Of course, the perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments, fulfilling to perfection the role for which it was made. But the poor cracked pot was ashamed of its imperfection and felt miserable that it was able to accomplish only half of what it had been created to do.

After two years of what it perceived to be a bitter failure, the cracked pot spoke to the water bearer one day by the stream. "I am ashamed of myself, and I want to apologize to you." "What are you ashamed of?" "I have been able, for these past two years, to deliver only half my load because this crack in my side causes water to leak out all the way back to your master's house. Because of my flaws, you have to do all of this work, and you don't get full value from your efforts," the pot said sadly.

The water bearer felt sorry for the old cracked pot. With compassion he said, "As we return to the master's house today, I want you to notice the beautiful flowers along the path."

Indeed, as they went up the hill, the old cracked pot took notice of the sun warming the beautiful wild flowers on the side of the path. This cheered the pot some, but at the end of the trail, it still felt bad because it had leaked out half its load. So again the pot apologized to the bearer for its failure.

The bear said to the pot, "Did you notice that there were flowers only on your side of your path, but not on the other pot's side? That's because I have always known about your flaw, and I took advantage of it. I planted flower seeds on your side of the path, and every day while we walk back from the stream, you've watered them. For two years I have been able to pick these beautiful flowers to decorate my master's table. Without your being just the way you are, he would not have this beauty to grace his house."

Actually, all of us are "cracked pots" with unique flaws. Our response to that fact is crucial to what we will become. If we realize our potential, in spite of our imperfections, we naturally reach forward. If we focus on our imperfections, we tend to compare ourselves with others, leading to the false belief that we have nothing to offer. This mindset deceives us into feeling unimportant or insignificant. 

By simply acknowledging our imperfections and moving forward, we will discover that we, like the imperfect pot, can be the cause of beauty. Just as the water bearer saw the unique contribution the imperfect pot could make in pleasing the king, so God sees our full potential and will help us bring pleasure to Him and become a source of beauty to others here on earth. 

[Source unknown]

Magnifying Glass

Magnifying glass on pink flower.
A few months ago, a newsletter from a friend caught my attention because of the way she dialogued with God about this verse:

And Mary said, “My soul magnifies the Lord,
and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior.”
Luke 1:46, 47 (ESV)

She asked God, “When Mary says her ‘soul’ magnifies the Lord,’ what does that mean, Lord? How do I do that…how can my soul magnify You? Please show me what that means.”

God led her to this definition of “magnify” by Chicago journalist, Patrick T. Reardon:

“Many modern translations begin, ‘My soul proclaims…’ or ‘My soul praises…,’ but I like the earlier word ‘magnifies’ because it’s kind of odd and mysterious. What Mary is saying is that she is like a magnifying glass. By looking at her—by looking through her—other people see God better.”(emphasis mine)

My friend continued with her insights. “It’s not uncommon for someone to say to us, ‘God worked through you.’ We have a high privilege to help others recognize God by our words and actions. By our smiles and willingness to listen.

“Howevera new picture has come into focus for me.

“Our task isn’t to do as many wonderful things as we can to represent God and show them God in us. My ordained role is not to reflect God in me. God has chosen me to simply stand in His presence, hold a magnifying glass in front of me, and let others look through the glass and see how awesome and amazing God is. God decides what things in my life He wants others to see. We don’t need to promote ourselves. Our role is to promote Him.”

In the past, I was happily aware that I have the privilege of reflecting Jesus to other people. My desire was that when they see ME, they would also see Jesus’ light in me. However, when we hold up a simple hand-held mirror, all we see is our own reflection.

Instead, He wants us to commune with Him in our soul and spirit, magnifying and exalting Him. Singing praises to Him and declaring His glory that always has been and always will be.

As we stand in His presence, we can hold our magnifying glass in front of us. When others look through that glass, they will see a clear view of all that God has brought into being.

O magnify the LORD with me, and let us exalt His name together.
Psalm 34:3 (NASB)

Will you hold up your magnifying glass so others can look through it and see the wonders God has displayed for them? Perhaps start by holding up a real magnifying glass in front of you and praying: “God, thank You that You are in my life and I can come freely into Your presence. Please guide me into opportunities to magnify You while I stand behind You. I praise You that I can have a part in helping others see You and Your works more clearly and glorify You.”