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Mary’s Heart

Hearing the song Mary Did You Know? always moves me to tears. Each time I try to imagine the emotions that swirled in Mary’s heart when the angel Gabriel presented the life-altering news that she would give life to the Son of God.

Have you ever wondered how Mary had the courage to respond to such a shocking message? She didn’t whisper a soft yes. She boldly declared, “Behold, the Lord’s bond-servant; may it be done to me, according to your word.”  

The reasons why young Mary accepted her mission so willingly is beautifully described by Debby Thompson, who writes under the banner of Living With Eternal Intentionality®. With Debby’s permission, I’m sharing this excerpt from her December blog, “Mary Said Yes.” You may read the rest of her story here.

Mary said Yes to God—to His will, to His plan, to His call on her life. Her destiny was contained in her response, and I am astounded each time I read it (Luke 1:38)! How was this humanly possible for one so young, so innocent?

A closer look sheds lights on her faith-filled choice.

Mary said yes to God because she knew the Word of God.

Because she knew the Word of God, she knew the Person of God

And

Because she knew the Person of God, she was prepared to say yes to the opportunity of God.

Her song (Luke 1:46-55) is saturated with Old Testament teaching where she exclaims the character of God, the faithfulness of God, the power of God, even the priorities of God. The significance of her response is steeped in the significance of Scripture. And here the connective gem emerges:

Knowing her God and knowing His Word laid the foundation for Mary to say yes to God with pure, simple faith.

The God that Mary knew invited her into His plan, and Mary said yes. She chose to believe (Luke 1: 45). She chose to obey.


Friends, in this divine season let us look for ways to deepen our love for God and our knowledge of His Word. Then, like Mary, we will be able to say yes to whatever invitation God presents to us in the coming year.

Appreciate What You Have

What a great perspective for us to embrace this year, 
especially during this week of Thanksgiving.

I sometimes take things for granted, do you? Acknowledging what I have, however, helps me look above difficult circumstances, disappointments, and fears, and focus on God rather than myself. Being thankful, restores my hope for the future and softens the effects of uncertainty. The truth that makes the greatest difference in my life is that I belong to God. He knows my name, gives me what I need each day, and will never stop loving me. A lifetime will never be long enough to thank Him for the wonderful relationship we share.

Below are some other blessings that came to my mind. What blessings are on your list?

Family

I no longer have parents or aunts and uncles who are alive to love me and encourage me. But I am thankful for my nieces, nephews, and cousins who like to hear my voice, seek my advice, and express their love to me. They know I am there for them, and they fill my life with joy. Some are facing serious crises with their children. This is a fragile time, but I know God has placed me in their lives so I can bring their burdens to my Heavenly Father and ask Him to show them the way when there seems to be no way.

Steadiness

God gives me physical, emotional, mental and spiritual fortitude to accept and deal with whatever happy or sad events spill into my days. By relying on this favorite verse in Psalms, I am able to stay steady.

I will praise the Lord, who counsels me; even at night my heart instructs me. I keep my eyes always on the Lord; with him at my right hand, I will not be shaken.

Psalm 16:8, NIV

Praying that your Thanksgiving Day will be memorable for you and your loved ones, in whatever way you celebrate.

Our Window of Time is Now

I sat with my legs dangling over the marble ledge at the front of the Lincoln Memorial in the National Mall. 

Three friends and I melded with more than 55,000 people to march in Washington D.C. on September 26, as participants of the Prayer March 2020 organized and led by Franklin Graham.

Excitement filled the air as the crowd anticipated what would take place first at the Lincoln Memorial, then the World War II memorial, Washington Monument, and three other historic stops before ending at the U.S. Capitol. 

While waiting for the event to begin, a delegation on the steps behind us began singing praise songs as if they were the designated choir. Our voices joined with theirs. When someone began singing from the front, we quickly recognized Michael W. Smith’s voice.

After this glorious time of worship, Franklin and his family crossed the field and walked to the central area. He welcomed the flood of people who stood on the steps and covered the area surrounding the reflection pond in front of us. He began his prayer, “Father, our country is in trouble, and we need your help.  We’re at a crucial point in this country.”

While Franklin was speaking, we noticed black limos approaching a side area that had been cleared of people. From our perfect viewing place, we watched the surprise arrival of Vice President Mike Pence along with his wife, Karen.

Following Franklin’s official introduction, Mike looked over the crowd and began speaking words of courage and hope. Then he shifted to the importance and urgency of prayer, along with assurance that God would hear our prayers. “In these challenging times, we are to remember that in everything by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, we are to present our requests to God. The Bible tells us to persevere in prayer. That the prayer of the upright pleases Him. That the effect of the fervent prayer of the righteous people avails much.”

After other leaders spoke at the Lincoln Memorial and lead us in fervent prayers, both corporately and individually, all of us connected to our mobile apps so we could listen to the presentations and prayers while we marched to each historic stop.

A favorite picture I took along the way focused on an older couple deep in prayer at the base of the Washington Monument. Small American flags attached to the railing waved in the breeze. Another delight was spotting a dozen young people huddled together in a circle, praying their hearts out. 

After our final prayers at the Capitol, my friends and I realized what a privilege we’d had to march with thousands of others to demonstrate our love for God and our trust in Him to hear our prayers and heal our nation. Yet, God was also speaking to our individual hearts, telling us we needed to examine our personal lives. This sense of urgency began the night before.

Even in the rain, we stood with thousands of others who had gathered for a simultaneous event called The Return, which lasted from Friday night through Saturday. Jonathan Cahn, author of The Harbinger and leader of The Return movement, organized this Return event to alert believers to God’s urgent call to search their hearts, repent, turn from their sins, and return to God so that revival could come to this nation and the world.

Prior to The Return event, Jonathan recalled the terrifying 9/11 attack and how people flocked to houses of worship out of fear and desperation. It appeared that revival might break out across the country, but he said it never happened because there was a lack of repentance in people’s hearts.

God declares in 2 Chronicles 7:14: “If My people who are called by My name will humble themselves and pray and seek My face and turn from their sinful ways, I will hear from heaven, I will forgive their sin, and I will heal their land.”

It is this petition from God that brought thousands of believers to Washington D.C. for these two events. Millions from 57 countries viewed the live streams. An undeniable confirmation of God’s presence throughout the weekend was that no opposition was seen or heard. The praise and prayers of believers gave the enemy no foothold.

The enemy is continually trying to defeat us individually, nationally, and globally. He wants to keep us from hearing God and following Him wholeheartedly. We must not pass up the opportunity for repentance, renewal and revival like we did after 9/11.

During that time of terror, both believers and unbelievers flooded the churches. Ironically, because of the current pandemic, churches were required to close their doors. People were isolated in their homes, unable to go to the very place where they could find love, hope, and a closeness to God. Believers had less opportunities to live out their faith for others to see.   

Franklin Graham says, “Nationwide transformation must begin in individual hearts. Pray for God to bring repentance and widespread renewal to the church so that believers will boldly share His love with others—and ask Him to draw lost people across our country to faith in Jesus Christ.” 

God is calling you and me to search our hearts, listen to His correction, and let go of any sins that block our relationship with Him. If we continually release our sins to God, and allow the Holy Spirit to fill us with power and courage to lead others to Christ, we can be part of the revival He longs to bring to our broken nation. Our window of time is now.

WATCH THE EVENTS IN WASHINGTON, D.C.

Millions of people from 57 countries viewed the Prayer March during the live stream. To watch all of the March and hear the wonderful commentary, click here.

To watch only the presentation and prayers at each of the seven stops of the Prayer March, click here.  

To watch the Friday night portion of The Return event, as well as Part 1 and Part 2 of Saturday, click here.

Dancing to the Music

As a ballroom dancer, I was intrigued by this challenge.

Life does play whatever music it wants. Some tunes may prompt us to drop what we’re doing, cast our cares aside, and move with abandonment. Melodious sounds might cause us to slow down and dream of what could be, while we sway from side to side. Music in a minor key might remind us of discord and strife. However, hearing that kind of music can motivate us to spring into action and bring about needed change.

No matter what music you hear, you have an opportunity to choose your dance and let our own unique personality flow out. That smile bubbling up from within you may be the light someone needs. Staccato movements that show a dramatic side of you might inspire others to try something new. When you dance with peaceful and gliding steps, without allowing the world to pull you into its battles, others may seek peaceful solutions for their difficult relationships or circumstances.    

We have a personal choice: behave the way the world dictates, or live the way God intends. Along the way, we will meet cooperative, accommodating, inviting, warm, and friendly people. But what about difficult people? How should we respond to them? My answer came through a story I heard recently.    

A man walked down the street with his friend. The friend paused at a newsstand and greeted the seller with a smile and a friendly, “Good morning.” Instead of reciprocating, the disgruntled person scowled at him, grabbed his money, and slapped the morning paper into his hand.

As they walked away, the man asked his friend if that person always treated him so roughly. The friend affirmed it was a daily occurrence. The next question was, “Are you always courteous and friendly to him like you were just now?”

“Yes, I am.”

Puzzled, the man asked, “Why are you so nice when he is so rude?”

The friend responded, “Because I don’t want him to decide how I’m going to act.”

Learning about this man’s daily choice in an unpleasant setting, changed my perspective. I am more determined to respond to people in a consistent way that honors God, no matter what they may say or do that challenges my way of life.

We can’t avoid hearing the music of the world, but we can choose how we dance to it. Can you think of a situation when you stayed strong and chose your own way to dance to life’s music?   

Light in the Darkness

 

In these last months we have seen so much darkness. Feelings of hopelessness have overwhelmed many people in this country and around the world.

How does God want us to respond? His Word makes it clear that He wants us to shine His light in this dark place. We may have no inkling of whether we are making a difference or not, but God knows. 

Let's ponder a few things Jesus said. Then I'll share a personal story about how God shone His light through me into someone's darkness, without my awareness.

This first passage in Matthew 5:14-16 may be a familiar one to you.

14 You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. 15 Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. 16 In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven. (NIV) 

As believers, we have the light of Christ in our lives. He doesn't want us to hide the light He's given us. Instead, He wants us to shine it like a beacon on a hill, or a lamppost along the road, or a flashlight on a path. Our light can shine brightly during personal conversations, as well as through phone calls, a written note, an email, or a post.

In John 8:12, Jesus talks about being the Light of the world in the midst of a tense discussion with some scribes and Pharisees.

Then Jesus again spoke to them, saying, “I am the Light of the world; he who follows Me will not walk in the darkness, but will have the Light of life." (NASB)

You can sense the burden that Jesus bore when He saw people remaining in darkness when they could be living in the light.

And this is where my story comes in. You never know what God is doing while you're seeking to shine His light.

One of my nephews has been walking in darkness. He's aware of God but continues to choose glittering, unhealthy activities. He did provide incredible physical help as caregiver to two people with major illnesses in our family. But his continuing destructive choices eventually led to life-threatening illnesses.

While his mother was living, we enjoyed a good relationship and built beautiful memories. He knew I was a Christian and seemed pleased about my chosen life career as a missionary. Though I freely talked about God around him, he never seemed interested in knowing God for himself.

After his mother's death, we lost track of each other. For 12 years. Until last month.

"Gail I turned 63 today. I miss u and I love u. Out of the hospital yesterday. Not in very good health. Actually lousy. I really want to connect with you. I have been through so much.  But there has not a day gone by I haven't had u in my mind.  And heart.  I so hope ur ok.  Anyway please get hold of me."

After recovering from my shock, I quickly wrote back to assure him of my love and God's love, and to help him realize God was offering him a chance to live.

That same day, he emailed me back. "I'm directing my life but under his direction. I had a short but great conversation with my nurse. I'm hoping if I keep my ears and heart open he will send me more of his great wisdom. Yesterday was a game changer for me. I'm gonna stop feeling like giving up. I miss u and I'll always love u."

My heart soared with the way his perspective had changed, conceivably through whatever words the nurse had spoken. I believe she was an angel sent by God to soften his heart so the watered seeds would have a chance to grow. 

During all those years of being around my nephew, I never knew what he was seeing or hearing. Now in this most desperate hour, God drew him back to where he had first seen the light. I will keep shining God's light on my 63-year-old nephew and showing him the way to open his heart to God while he still has life and breath.

Friends, don't despair about what is happening around you. Keep the Light within you burning brightly, so it will shine in the darkness of someone else's life.

Do you have a story to tell? Or a way you have been blessed by having the Light of the world in you? Feel free to leave your comment below. 

 

Are you free of fear?

Is fear of rejection controlling your life? I’ve developed a quiz that will help you answer that important question.

Even into my adult years, I had no idea that this devastating fear was defining my life. Now that I’ve found freedom from my fear, I’m eager to help others find the path to freedom.     

This quiz will help you take two steps toward your path to freedom. First, you will have a chance to acknowledge any symptoms of the fear of rejection. The second step will show you how to recognize barriers you may have built that prevent people from knowing who you really are.

Take a moment now and see how you score on the Fear of Rejection Quiz. Then share this link with others—you may help someone who is unaware they are struggling with this fear. You can break the barriers that prevent you from experiencing freedom. Download your quiz now.

No! I can’t do that!

 


You may remember that my April Monthly Musings centered on the disciple Peter, who floundered after the death of his friend, Jesus. As he stood at the sea, he announced to his friends, “I’m going fishing.” A decision that would take him back to his old, familiar way of life. 

Here was my response to that scene: “I pondered what my own future would look like. When the doors of confinement are flung open, would I return to ‘fishing as usual,’ or would I choose to leave my safety net—my familiar, normal way of living—and walk into God’s future for me?”

At the end of my blog, I presented us with a challenge: “Let’s walk away from our nets—our familiar way of living—and step into the new lifestyle God has prepared for us.”

Now, let me tell you what happened after I pushed the send button for my April Musings.

When I began reading my emails, the first message presented an unusual, exciting opportunity. However, instead of responding with an enthusiastic yes and stepping forwardas I had encouraged you to do only minutes before—I gasped and said to myself, “No! I can’t do that!”

Most likely, God smiled at the refusal. After calming down from my initial outburst, I talked to God, who gently reminded me that I had prayed for more speaking engagements. The light went on. 

The email contained an invitation from Mike Gilland, the station manager of Shepherd Radio in Orlando, to be his guest on the “Afternoons with Mike” segment. “What day is most convenient for you to record the 50-minute interview?” he asked.

I emailed him, “Wednesday morning would work well,” 

Although I’d done several radio interviews in the past, being part of a broadcast in my home area seemed intimidating. After emailing my friends about this newest adventure, and admitting my nervousness, I asked them to pray for confidence, courage, and ability.

My favorite response to this prayer request came from Pat Hunt:

“Thank you, Gail, for branching out and reaching out to a ‘hurting world.’  I'm praying you will know the fruits of your boldness and faithfulness in answering the call from our Lord. I'll look forward to receiving the link to the interview.”

The radio interview with Mike Gilland turned into one of the most exhilarating and rewarding experiences I’ve had so far. One reason for my pleasure surely flowed from my willingness to finally obey God’s call. The interview allowed me to highlight some of the amazing ways God has worked in my life. Mike opened the way to tell listeners how I met Jesus; some of my experiences from 50 years of serving with Campus Crusade/Cru in the US and the Philippines; and the backstory and my passion for writing my two books.

Everyone's prayers transformed the interview into something beautiful and memorable. The responses amazed me.   

“Wonderful, inspiring, and gratifying talk, Gail. So from the heart and so personal. I'll be sharing it.’

“What a wonderful interview! The sound was so clear and the interviewer was truly prepared to ask good questions.
You were amazingly clear in sharing your work and powerful walk with Jesus and trust in God.”

“Wonderful! Amazing!  I listened to the whole broadcast and I'm so proud of you.
You did a great job and the interview was very meaningful and well done.”

“I enjoyed listening to the radio interview. How pleasing to see that God is greatly using you now as an author.
It is so exciting to see how the Holy Spirit weaves all the parts of our lives together as we continue
in our process of growth as ‘fishers of men’! I will continue to pray for God to bless your ministry!”

 “I'm praying for the same spirit of faithfulness and devotion in anything God calls me to do
regardless if it's big or small.”

Last week, I had another chance to “walk into God’s future.” Athena Dean Holtz, author and owner of Redemption Press, asked to interview me for her All Things Podcast. This time, instead of hesitating, I agreed immediately because I recognized this was part of God's plan for my life. 

Have you stepped into something new or unexpected recently? Share about your experience or leave your thoughts about this blog in the comment box below.

 

Recent Podcasts

LISTEN to Gail share about her life as well as her books
The Shepherd Radio podcast

HEAR Gail reveal how she discovered the path to freedom
where she can be the Real Person God created her to be
The All Things podcast

Do you and your friends have a copy of Gail’s books? 

Will the Real Person Please Stand Up? Rising Above the Fear of Rejection
Redemption Press Link  Amazon Link  Barnes & Noble Link

Life Through Loss: Facing Your Pain, Finding Your Purpose
Amazon Link  Barnes & Noble Link

I am going fishing

The water lapped at the feet of the ruddy-faced men who stood at the edge of the Sea of Tiberias. Normal bantering and fast movements pushed aside, they gazed at the horizon, uncertain of what to do next.

Peter slowly turned to face the others and quietly announced,

“I am going fishing.”

His fishermen friends looked at one another and then answered,

“We will also come with you.”

Picking up their fishing net, they dragged it to their nearby boat. Mustering all the inner strength they could find, they tried to put their hearts into another day of fishing.

A few years before, they had left their nets and followed Jesus willingly. Every time they observed scales falling from the eyes of blind people, and watched Jesus straighten crippled limbs, their faith grew stronger. Even though their bodies were weary at the end of long days, their hearts were filled with purpose.

Now, through a terrifying series of events, they had lost their best friend, their leader, and the one whose footsteps they had followed. Everything had changed. They were alone.

All they knew to do was push away from the shore. Fishing was familiar. Surely they would bring in their daily quota.

By the end of the day, however, they were heading to shore with an empty boat. Disappointment and bewilderment welled up inside of them. What had they done wrong? They’d been fishing almost their whole lives…until Jesus came along.

Two questions lingered in their weary minds: “How will we survive without Him? What are we supposed to do?”

Suddenly, a man appeared on the beach and spoke to them gently.

“Children, you do not have any fish, do you?
Cast the net on the right-hand side of the boat,
and you will find a catch.”

With nothing to lose, they followed the man’s instruction. Soon, 153 fish flopped around in their net. Without a doubt, they knew this man was the Lord.

Jesus knew the fear that gripped their hearts and the despair that shouted, “You have no future.” He was about to reveal a new plan.

Jesus had a charcoal fire waiting for them when they came to land. He said,

“Bring some of the fish which you have now caught.
Come and have breakfast.”

They eagerly settled in beside him. As He began serving them, they remembered the words He had spoken during His earlier appearance:

 “Peace be with you; as the Father has sent Me, I also send you.”

He then breathed on them and said,

“Receive the Holy Spirit.”

There on that beach, His disciples realized Jesus was giving them a new call, a personal call. Equipped with the power of the Holy Spirit and infused with new purpose, they left their nets once again and walked by faith into their own ministries of preaching the gospel and bringing souls into God’s kingdom.

As I read this familiar Bible passage*, I pondered what my own future would look like. When the doors of confinement are flung open, would I return to “fishing as usual,” or would I choose to leave my safety net—my familiar, normal way of living—and walk into God’s future for me?

I decided I don’t want to backtrack. I’ve asked God to help me preserve my new lifestyle that has evolved out of COVID-19.

The most special part is having unlimited time to meet with God in the mornings and talk to Him throughout the day. I’ve been able to slow down, relax and guard against my usual hectic pace. I feel pleasure, rather than guilt, whenever I have a long lunch on my porch. Interestingly, even with this slower pace, I’ve made significant progress on my writing goals and other priorities, and even tackled a needed reorganization project.

I’m enjoying people more. A nightly bike ride around my condo complex with a friend gives me needed physical exercise while also opening a way to know my neighbors better and meet new ones. The four of us on my side of the building have shared food, checked up on each other, and shared laughter and words of encouragement. We were close before, but nothing like this.

While being cooped up, I’ve frequently talked with my nieces, nephews, cousins, and personal friends. I’m on a roll, and I want to keep going.

Because we can’t congregate as a church family, our leaders have developed new touchpoints for us during the week, in addition to the services streamed online. Isn’t it exciting that more people are viewing church services now than ever before?

You probably have your own list of positive results. Many of you parents have developed creative family times inside your homes. While your children engage in online learning, you’ve found ways to encourage their teachers. Families and individuals have stepped forward and packed food bags to deliver to frontline people.

Even after we’re free to roam wherever we want, we can keep giving these gifts to others: kindness, gratitude, understanding, empathy, a listening ear, words of hope, and assurance that God loves them and has a good future planned for them.

Let’s preserve those things that have produced new values in us and changed our perspectives on life. Let’s walk away from our nets—our familiar way of living—and step into the new lifestyle God has prepared for us.

In addition to the wonderful parts of your lives that were in place before COVID-19, what new things do you want to continue doing?


*The Bible story is based on the book of John, chapter 21.

Fear or Faith?

I invited my friend, Shirley Mewhinney, to share her recent experiences
during the unexpected crisis that has rocked our world.

There isn't a better message for our world today than Gail's blog title, Live Above Fear!

In our private times, and even in public, most of us are experiencing moments of fear and anxiety as we wait out one of the most severe times of testing our nation has ever faced, a new war known as COVID-19.

I’ve heard that our current world disaster closely rivals the last great crisis, World War II, for its toll on our national resources and stamina. I was born during the World War II era, so along with my age, my diabetes puts me in the current highest COVID-19 risk category. Needing to accomplish tasks while isolated in the confines of my own home has increased my anxiety.

Thoughts rush through my mind:  What is happening out there? Why can't I have a part in helping with such great needs?  How will I keep myself supplied with the products I need?  How can I stay safe when the enemy is invisible? Am I taking enough precautions? Will my loved ones be safe? How can I live above fear?

Early one morning I woke up with food on my mind, not because I was hungry; but because I felt anxious about how I could maintain my routine of going out to purchase fresh produce and other healthy food to keep my well-controlled diabetes stable.

Feeling somewhat helpless, I reached for my daily devotional book* published in 1993 and turned to March 17. I discovered a message relevant to 2020. The title was a question, “Do You Worry?” followed by a passage from Psalms.

All living things look to You for food,
and You give it to them at the right time.
You open Your hand, and You satisfy all living things.
Psalm 145: 15-16

The author then explained that the word "worry" comes from a word meaning "to divide." When we worry, our focus is divided and we become our own problem. I knew I needed to refocus and trust God to provide what I need.

A couple mornings later, I woke up concerned about my health. What does a person do if they begin experiencing symptoms of the coronavirus? During my isolation, I had heard many "don'ts" but hadn’t discovered many "do’s."

Again, I reached for my devotional book and turned to March 19. “Trust in the Lord” was the heading this time, accompanied by another portion from Psalms.

God, I look to You for help. I trust in You, Lord.
Psalm 141:8 

The author spoke directly to my heart’s concern when he said, "Do not put your hope in things that can change—relationships, money, talents, beauty, even health. Set your sights on the things that can never change: trust in your heavenly Father."

God knew I needed to trust Him for nutritious food and ways to respond to health issues. I refocused my thoughts on His love and faithfulness. He is the One who never changes, though everything in our world may shift, instilling fear in our hearts.

Some may remember how brave and united our country was during World War II.  Civilians and military alike were rushing into harm’s way to save our nation. Today, heroes in our nation and around the world are putting themselves in danger to avert the spread of this invisible virus, and one great way we can all participate and live above fear is to pray for them and one another as we have been doing in all times of threat.

Even though we have and will suffer heartbreaking losses personally and as a nation, we can trust our never-changing God. With His power and grace, our nation did come back following World War II, and we will come back again from COVID-19.

* Walking with the Shepherd, by Max Lucado

Slices of Time

What is the hardest thing for you to give up on a daily basis?

For me, it’s my time. Since I’m a planner, it’s a continual challenge to release time to spend with people and get involved with things outside my agenda. In the past, I gave more priority to my projects than to people.

However, in recent years God showed me the importance of sometimes letting go of my neatly-arranged plan so I can enjoy opportunities to spend time with others. Even when it’s only a slice of time, the beauty and the memories that fill my life make it worth it. Time with people is more often at the top of my list now.

This life-changing lesson from God produced a willingness and a desire to build a deeper and more meaningful relationship with Uncle Miles. When my Aunt Elia passed away, his life changed drastically. Mine did, too. Her death was one of many cascading illnesses and death among my family within a short period of time. In my sorrow, I cried out to God, “Father, please don’t take Uncle Miles yet. I can’t say goodbye to anyone else right now. Please let me have more time with him.”

God gave me six years. Those were the most memorable years in our relationship, because Uncle Miles and I became close friends, not just family. Our friendship filled the empty places in both of our lives. We began calling each other every weak—he from the west coast and I from the east side of the country. We discussed family memories and happenings, but he always wanted to know about me. And I asked about the highlights and downsides of his life at the retirement center.

It didn’t matter that he was in his 90’s. He stayed engaged in my life. Each year in the fall, I traveled to Oregon for two weeks to see family and friends. I made time to visit Uncle Miles often, talk on the phone in between visits, and enjoy some meals together. We also started a tradition of taking a day trip together, usually drinking in the beauty of the Colombia River gorge and enjoying the majesty of Mt. Hood. Though hindered by macular degeneration, he remained in charge, cautioning me and making sure I didn’t miss any turns.

One year, after delivering him back to the center following our trip, we sat in his apartment and talked some more. Words full of encouragement and mutual admiration and affirmation flowed between us.

Finally, we stood and hugged each other good-bye. “Honey, thanks for spending time with me. Really enjoyed your visit and especially our trip today.”

Knowing that I was leaving the next day, we looked into each other’s eyes with love. I believe he knew he would never see me again. I was unaware. Perhaps that’s why God prompted me to say, “Uncle Miles, I’ll see you next time . . . but if not, I’ll see you in heaven.”

Uncle Miles died less than three months later, not from an illness, but unexpectedly one early morning at the age of 97. It’s been three years, and I still cry about his absence at times. Yet, I have no regrets because God showed me how to give up my time more freely—even small slices of time—so I wouldn’t miss the chance to build memories with my uncle that I’ll cherish forever.

What memories have you been able to build with a special person because you adjusted your plan and spent more time with them?

Life Through Loss:
Facing Your Pain, Finding Your Purpose
Available at ​Amazon Link